Sunday, May 1, 2011

Week 1: TASKS & CHECK-IN

  1. Every morning Write 3 Pages of Morning Pages, Every Day, 7 Days a Week, Non-Negotiable !!!
    1. Do not reread these pages or allow anyone else to read them.
    2. Be sure to work with your affirmations of choice and your blurts at the end of each day's morning pages.
    3. Convert all blurts into positive affirmations.
  2. Take yourself on an Artist Date.  You will do this Every Week for the duration ofthe course.  A sample Artist Date:  Take $5 and go to Walmart, and buy silly things like gold star stickers, tiny dinosaurs, postcards, sparkly sequins, glue, crayons... You might give yourself a gold star on your envelope each day you write !! or put it on your Artist's Way book ???  something ??? 
  3. Time Travel:  List three old enemies of your creative self-worth.  Please be as specific as possible in doing this exercise.  Your historic monsters are the building blocks of your core negative beliefs.(that rotten teacher from 5th grade count, and the rotten thing she said to you does matter.  Put that teacher down!)  This is your Monster Hall of Fame.  More monsters will come to you as you work through your recovery.  It is always necessary to acknowledge creative inuries and grieve them.  Otherwise,  they become creative scar tissue and block your growth.
  4. Time Travel:  Select and write out one horror story from your Monster Hall of Fame.  You do not need to write long or much, but do jot down whatever details come back to you--the room you were in, the way people looked at you, the way you felt, what your parent said or didn't say when you told about it.  Include whatever bothered you about the incident: You may draw a sketch of your old monster or to clip out an mage that evokes the incident for you..  Cartoon trashing your monster, or at least draw a nice red X through it.
  5. Write a letter to the editor in your defense.  Mail it to yourself.  It is agreat fun to write this letter in the voice of your worunded artist child:  "To whom it may concer:  Sister Ann Rita is a jerk and has pig eyes and I can too paint and spell !!!"
  6. Time Travel:  List three old champions of your creative self-worth.  This is your hallof champions, those who wish you and your creativity well.  Be specific.  Every encouraging word counts.  Even if you disbelieve a compliment, record it.  It may well be true.  If your are stuck for compliments, go back through your time-travel log and look for positive memories.  When, where, and why did you feel good abput yourself?  Who gave you affirmation?
    1. Additionally, you may wish to write the compliment out and decorate it!!  Post it near where you do your Morning Pages or on the dashboard of your car.  Anywhere you want !!!  
  7. Time Travel:  Select and write out one happy piece of encouragement.  Write a thank-you letter.  Mail it to yourself or to the long-lost mentor.
  8. Imaginary Lives:  If you had five other lives to elad, what would you do in each of them?  I would be a pilot,  cowboy, rancher, a psychic, monk, scuba diver, dancer, teacher, soap-opera star, etc. etc. etc...  Whatever occurs to you, jot it down.  Do not overthink this exercise.  The point of these lives is to have fun in them--more fun than you might be having in this one.  Look over your list and select one.  Then do this week.  For example:  if you put down country singer, can you picka  quitar?  If you dream of being a cowboy, can you do some horseback riding?
  9. In working with affirmations and blurts, very often injuries and monsters swim back to us.  Add these to your list as they occur to you..Work iwth each blurt individually.  Trun each negative into an affirmative positive.
  10. Take your artist for a walk, the two of you.  A brisk 20 min walk can dramatically alter consciousness.

WEEKLY CHECK - IN :

You will do check-ins every week.  If your are running your creative week Sunday to Sunday, do your check-ins each Saturday.  Remember that this Recover is Yours.  What you think is important, and it will become increasingly interesting to you as you progress.  You may want to do check-ins in your Morning Pages.  It's best to answer by hand and allow about 20 min to respond.  The purpose of Check-Ins is to give you a journal of your creative journey.  It is my hope that you will later share the tools with others and in doing so find our own notes invaluable:  "Yes, I was mad in week four.  I loved week five. etc..."

  1. How many days this week did you do your Morning Pages?  7 out of 7 ???  How was the experience for you?
  2. Did you do your Artist Date this week?  Artist Dates can be remarkably difficult to allow yourself.  What did you do?  How did it feel??
  3. Were there any other issues this week that you consider significant for your recovery?  Describe them.

Your Ally Within: AFFIRMATIVE WEAPONS

Affirmations will help you allow yourself to do it.  An affirmation is a positive statement of (positive) belief, and if we can become one-tenth as good at positive self-talk as we are at negative self-talk, we will notice an enormous change. Affirmations help achieve a sense of safety and hope.  When we first start working with affirmations, they may feel dumb, hokey and embarrassing.  But saying nice things about ourselves is notoriously hard to do.  It feels pretty awful at first.  Thy these and see if they don't sound hopelessly syrupy:
  • I deserve love.
  • I deserve fair pay
  • I deserve a rewading creative life.
  • I am a brilliant and successful artist.
  • I have rich cretive talents.
  • I am competent and confident in my creative work.
Did your Censor perk its nasty little ears up??  Censors loathe anything that sounds like real self-worth.  they immediately start up with the imposter routine.  "Who do you think you are?"
Just try picking an affirmation.  For example "I, Oscar Zepeda, am a brilliant and prolific painter."Write that ten times in a row
  1. I, Oscar Zepeda, am a brilliant and prolific painter.
  2. I, Oscar Zepeda, am a brilliant and prolific painter.
  3. I, Oscar Zepedda, am a brilliant and prolific painter.
  4. I, Oscar Zepeda, am a brilliant and prolific painter.
  5. I, Oscar Zepeda, am a brilliant and prolific painter.
  6. I, Oscar Zepeda, am a brilliant and prolific painter.
  7. I, Oscar Zepeda, am a brilliant and prolific painter.
  8. I, Oscar Zepeda, am a brilliant and prolific painter.
  9. I, Oscar Zepeda, am a brilliant and prolific painter.
  10. I, Oscar Zepeda, am a brilliant and prolific painter.
While your are busy doing that,  something very interesting will happen. Your Censor will start to object.  "Hey, wait a minute.  You can't say all that positive stuff around me."  Objections will start to pop up like burnt toast.  These are your blurts.  Listen to the objections.  Look at the ugly, stumpy little blurts.  "Brilliant and prolific... sure you are... Since when??   Can't paint !!   Can't Sell any of paintings !!  Who are you kidding ??  Who do you think you are ???  etc... etc.... etc.....

You'll be amazed at the rotten things your subconscious will blurt out.  Write them down.  These blurts flag your personal negative core beliefs.  They hold the key to your freedom in the ir ugly little claws.  Make a list of your personal blurts.  Where do your blurts come from?  Mom?  Dad?? Teachers ? Friends or Family ?  Using your list of blurts, scan your past for possible sources.  At least some of them will spring violently to mind.  One effective way to locate the sources is to time-travel.  Break your life into five-year incredments, and list by name your major influences in each time block. 

(Re-Read Page 35 in the Artist's Way book about Paul)

Turn now to your own list ofblurts.  They are very important to your recovery.  Each of them has held you in bondage.  Each of them must be dissolved.  For example, a blurt that runs, "I, Fred, am untalented and phony" might be converted to the affirmation "I, Fred, am genuinely talented."  Use your affirmations after your Morning Pages and also use any of the Creative Affirmations listed.


Daily CREATIVE AFFIRMATIONS !!! Must Read Daily !!!!!

  • I am a channel for Infinite Divine's creativity, and my work comes to good.
  • My dreams come from the Infinite Divine and the Infinite Divine has the power to accomplish them.
  • As I create and listen, I will be led.
  • Creativity is the creator's will for me.
  • My creativity heals myself and others.
  • I am allowed to nurture my artist.
  • Through the use of a few simple, tools, my creativity will flourish.
  • through the use of my creativity, I serve Infinite Divine.
  • May creativity always leads me to truth and love.
  • My creativity leads me to forgiveness and self-forgiveness.
  • There is a Divine plan of goodness for me.
  • There is a Diving plan of goodness for my work.
  • As I listen to the creator within, I am led.
  • As I listen to my creativity I am led to my creator.
  • I am willing to create.
  • I am willing to learn to let myself create.
  • I am willing to let Infinite Divine create through me.
  • I am willing to be of service through my creativity.
  • A am willing to experience my creative energy.
  • I am willing to use my creative talents.

Filling the Well & Stocking the Pond

Art is an image-using system.  In order to create, we draw from our inner well.  This inner well, an artistic reservoir, is ideally like a well-stocked trout pond.  We've got beig fish, little fish, fat fish, skinny fish--an abundance of artistic fish to fry.  As artists, we must realize that that we have to maintain this artistic ecosystem.  If we don't give some attention to upkeep, our well is apt to become depleted, stagnant, or blocked.  Any extended period or piece of work draws heavily on our artistic well.

As artists, we must learn to be self-nourishing.  We must become aleart enough to consciously replenish our creative resources as we draw on them--to restock the trout pond.  The process is called Filling the Well.  Filling the well involves the active pursuit of images to refresh our artistic reservoirs.  Art is born in attention.  Its midwife is detail  Art may seem to spring from pain, but, perhaps that is because pain serves to focus our attention onto details.

In filling the well, think magic.  Think delight.  Think fun.  Do not think duty.  Do not do what you should do--spiritual sit-ups like reading a dull but recommended critical text.  Do what intriques you, explore what interests you; think mystery, not mastery.  A mystery draws us in, leads us on, lures us.  In filling the well, follow your sense of the mysterious, not our sense of what you should know more about.

A mystery can be very simple:  if I drive this road, not my usaul road, what will I see?  Changing a knon route throws us into the now.  We become refocused on the visible, visual world.  Sight leads to insight.  Our focused attention is critical to filling the well.  We need to encounter our life experiences, not ignore them.  Many of us read compulsively to screen our awareness.

My 1st ARITST DATE !!!!!!! Willowbrook Wildlife Center !!!

I'm going to use this particular Post to document my Artist's Dates... and what I did and to document the experience...

Date #1: Friday, April 29, 2011 Approx 3-4 pm, Willowbrook Animal Rehabilitation Center...in Glen Ellyn, IL...  Willowbrook Wildlife Center

Just like "the Artist's Way" stated that the "Killjoy" will somehow seep in, saying that you don't need to go, that you're already good, you've been there before, you know what to expect, and I was actually on the brink of not going, I spent the morning and afternoon at the college and was going to be on my way, after I got paid... So I decided, I must do what I said, that I was going to do.... Regardless on my mood and situation, that the Artist Date is Also Non-Negotiable !!!!   just like the Morning Pages !!!  So I went...

I'm sooo glad I went on my 1st Artist Day !!!  Afterwards, OMG !!!!  while I was reading the Artist's Way book and also typing some points in this blog, I realized that No One Ever Did that for me, to go on a date, just to see some of the Infinite Divine's Ultimate Creations !!!  Wow, I did got emotional, that No One Ever Looked Out for Me Ever Before, like that, just to go and explore and to appreciate, It was absolutely beautiful !!!!  It was beautiful time with me, my absolute true artist child self and with the Infinite Divine, there was  a Golden Eagle which I absolutely was inspired, soooo Magnificent !!!  Sooo Powerful !!!  Wow !!!!  I was there, communicating with him... Sooo beautiful !!! I loved every nano-second of our time together !!! See, the Killjoy Censor, will for sure say, you don't have time, look at the time, you have to be here, if you don't go now traffic will be bad, oh yeah, the Censor was for sure trying to win, but, I said, Nope, it's Non-Negotiable !!!  I must go to my Artist's Dates !!!  No, If's &'s or Buts !!!!  Wow, Julia was right on the money, stating that the Killjoy Censor will try Anything to make you not go on your Artist Date !!!!  I must had a back n forth conversation, for about 5 min, shall I, shouldn't I, shall I, ???  and just receiving good solid points and facts from the Killjoy Censor that this time is not a good time for your Artist Date, that I don't have time, you want to miss traffic going back to Morton Grove....  oh yeah, it was definitely an internal boxing match going on !!  and I just I don't care if in traffic for 5 hours !!!  I have a full tank of gas and I'm going !!!  and I did !!!  I just laid down the law and went, and I didn't care what time it was ??  or that I needed to be somewhere ... and then afterwards, it didn't really sink in about a day or 2 later, when I was typing in this blog and also reading about the Artist Date in the book, that made me realize that No One Ever Did that for me !!!  Fight and Laid down the law for my Artist Date !!!  That No One Ever Cared that Much for me or have Done That For Me !!!  and right when I got that, some tears started to well up and both eyes, released some tears.... yeah, it was definitely a very special moment.... like right now, just writing about it again.... Whoa.... this is very deep !!! very very deep !!! I'm actually getting a bit teary eyed again, right now... Whoa .... I never had experienced anything like this ever in my entire life !!!   Whewwwww, needed to take some deep breaths... ok, much better !!!  :o) !!!!  So, if you're on the brink of going and not going on your Artist's Date ??  just remember, it's just like the Morning Pages !!!  It's Non-Negotiable !!!!!  Regardless if you're sick, no money, no time ???  just do it... //  You may think that you don't have a Killjoy Censor, just like I did !!! ???  after I read that in the book, me ??  Killjoy ???  Naaaaaa... .hunh ??  as soon as you're thinking of going right then and there BAM !!!! Ding, Ding, Ding !!!!  let the boxing match begin !!!!! just like what happened with me !!!!  So, just remember, you're the KING !!! The World and Universe Revolves Around YOU !!!  and Lay Down the Law !!!!  This is What I'm Going To Do, No If's &'s or Buts !!!!  and Do It !!!

I didn't expect such a humongous deep awareness, awakening and transforming experience that was !!!  and this was after my 1st Artist Date !!!!   to a place where I've been to before, about 3-4 times !!!!  The Killjoy Censor was definitely hitting me with Time, I've been here before, you're all good, you don't need to go, traffic is going to be bad later so I need to go now to Morton Grove, ohhhh I was getting hit left and right !!!  All Solid Hits !!!!  All were very true !!!  But, I remembered that the Morning Pages and the Artist's Dates Are NON-NEGOTIABLE !!!!!!!  If you're not dead !!!!!  Yo Ass Better Be Writing those 3 full pages of Morning Pages and Going on Your Artist Dates !!!!  Case Closed !!!  So, with that in mind, I did take some pics of my 1st Artist Here they are !!!!  Enjoy !!  but, better yet, go on a date yourself !!!!  Oz











My 2nd Artist Date !!!!  Sat, April 30, 2011
I also want to put in here my 2nd Artist Date !!!!!  I had such an Overwhelming Response with my 1st one, that since I did had some $$ and that I wanted to see  a great movie !!!  I decided to go and see a movie !!!  I wanted to see "RIO", about 2 Blue Birds !!  I had to best time in my Entire Life !!!  I kid you not, I knew I was probably the only one in the theater that was having the Best Time in my Entire Life !!!  I was laughing, I was laughing sooo much that I had to suppress my intense and immense laughter and happiness !!!  Wow, I was in Park Ridge, IL at the Pickwick Theater !!!  I had the Best Time with myself !!!  and I was the last one to leave, the movie was playing some Awesome hip hop tunes with the credits, and I was beep bopping my head and dancing from my seat !!!  so I had the best time !!!  I think I had more fun that any of the kids that was there !!!  All Good !!!!  All Very Good !!!  so... I just wanted to write about my 2nd Artist Movie Day Date !!!  after the Rio Movie at Pickwick, I wanted the larger screen and louder volume effect so I went to the AMC at Gold Mill Mall !!!!  and watched the Elephant Movie ??  forgot the title, with Resse Witherspoon !!??? and another guy... Jacob (Polish) movie name ???  and then I went to see Fast 5 !!! OMG !!!!  I'm not into the Action Packed Fighting Car Chase Movies, but this one !!!! OMG !!! I love it !!!  It was Totally Awesome !!!! Everyone Applauded Afterwards, Daaamn, there were some Super Fine Ladies in the movie !!!  they shot it in Rio !!!  Wow !!!  I definitely had a great time !!!  they spent a lot of time and $$$ in that movie !!!  Wow !!!  Those Car Scenes !!!!  Was Absolutely Above and Beyond what I have ever imagined !!!  yeah,,,, it was a Super Sick Ass Movie !!!  and then after that, didn't feel like going, so I attempted to watch another movie, I wasn't feeling it, so I went to see African Cats that was already started, All Good... So I got to watch some Beautiful Nature Wildlife !!!!  I absolutely love watching that !!!  Wow !! Especially on the Big Screen and not on the laptop !!!  Really and Truly is an Amazing Experience !!! Just imagining myself in the scenes !!!  Wow !!!  the clouds, the rain, the absolute beauty of our Amazing World.... Yesss... Thank You !!!  So, I had a great 2nd Artist Date !!!  I Absolutely Deserved It !!!  Taking Out the Artist Child...  Yes, I'm getting this.... Thank You Infinite Divine !!!  Thank You !!!  Oz